New Home

I apologize for not having posted this already, but I have a new blog and a new home online.  So, if ever in the mood to be more bored than you already are, check out Sojourning.

we are

We are redeemed from the empty way. Partakers in abundant life. We are the salt of the earth. The light of the world. We are obedient sheep. Friends of the Christ.

We are from every tribe and every nation yet baptized by the same Spirit; parts of the same Body; branches on the same Vine. We are imitators of God. We are freed from the bonds of sin and still exiles in a fallen world, aliens wandering a country not our own. Yet, we are a holy nation, a royal priesthood, a noble race. We are hopeless yet believing, men of sorrows, acquainted with grief. We are destined to suffer and still destined to win. We are saved. By His power we cast out demons, heal the sick, and bind up the wounded. We are lovers of the unloved. Heralds of the coming King. Soldiers of Christ. Temples of the Holy Spirit. Adopted sons of the Father.

We are knit together in love. Unified in faith and knowledge. Bearers of one another’s burdens. Brothers for all eternity. We are co-heirs with the Son of God. We are nothing. We are His. And we are loved.

brotherhood

“Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity! It is like the precious oil on the head, running down the beard, on the beard of Aaron, running down on the collar of his robes! It is like the dew of Hermon, which falls on the mountains of Zion! For there the LORD has commanded the blessing: life forevermore.” Psalm 133

If we are made in the image of God and our Triune Lord is the ultimate picture of community, then unified brotherhood must be a beautiful expression of an awesome Creator. It is the closest glimpse I have ever had to truly grasping the Trinity and how He/They even work. In fact, Elohim, God’s first name in Genesis (Creator), is a plural name… signifying His three part self from the very first sentence of His Scriptures. He is Community and, as 1 John will later say, He is Love.

Brotherhood. Community. Family.

These things are holy. They were fashioned before the Fall, and though our sin tainted all Creation, they still exemplify the higher Entity that embodies them. The world in which we reside still recognizes love to be greater than all other things. Why else would they who are “dead” still get married? Have children? Have friendships? Have funerals?

They watch Oprah, Friends, Band of Brothers, Romeo and Juliet and every other depiction of unbreakable friendship as they long and ache for that to appear in their own lives… somehow filling the lonely, gaping hole in their heart.

The Lost recognize the greatness of love, though they cannot tap into it fully without Love Himself winning their souls.

Oh that He would save them – and once He does – let them overflow with a unifying love for brothers and sisters in the Lord and for the walking dead they encounter!

If we as Christ followers are to be imitators of the Son, and the Son is One with the Father and Spirit, then we too should be one with them. But since we, as blemished children, cannot (and most certainly should not) achieve that union, He has blessed us with the Church, with brotherhood, and a chance to be in the next best thing: unity.

This is why Adam had no companion until Eve was formed. This is why Jonathan’s soul was said to have been “knit” to David’s and why they loved each other more than their own selves. This is why the Mighty Men sacrificed themselves in protection of their king. This is why Silas stood his ground alongside Paul as they were captured and tortured time and time again. And this is why Luke continued to bind up their wounds without ever thinking twice.

This is why Jesus, our very Lord, prayed, “I will remain in the world no longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name—the name you gave me—so that they may be one as we are one.”

It is in this unity that we get to witness the Trinity. This community glorifies God in a deeper way than most anything at all. Relationships are made of love and He is love. Therefore, this precious bond that ties us all together is an ancient, never ending, praise to the Lord.

This love is not surface level. It is built on vulnerability. On truth. On service. On encouragement. And, above all, on Christ. This not not love as the world calls it but a greater risk to ourselves and of a stronger power by the Spirit. Just as we die to ourselves for Christ's sake, we are to die to ourselves for the sake of others'. Honesty and sacrifice must reign in unity.

Oh that we would dwell in unity! Oh that we would not take friendship for granted or prioritize anything under God as more important. Paul spent so much of his epistles beating this into the young Church’s head. Let us never forget. Our love for each other is His creation. Our love for each other connects us to Him. Our love for each other worships God.

Father, make your children here in College Station one as you and Christ are One. Be glorified in us. Let us be intentional. Let us love hard. Let us push back the darkness.

Bless my house and my roommates. Reign in us and over us. Bring unity to us that comes only by Jesus’ name. Bless Daniel. Bless Nick. Bless Spencer. Make our home a place of refuge from the storms of life to all who enter its doors.

Brothers and sisters, enjoy each other today. Recognize your God in your friendships. We need to be praying hard. May Jesus be glorified!

wonderfully limping

Many men show glimpses of their innermost being through song, poetry, and paints. Many men express their heartache and joys simply in the lives they live, the hobbies they carry, and the definition they hold for fulfillment. I often speak most freely with pen in hand and blank pages open before me. My prayer journal was certainly one of my closest companions this last summer. Oh the communion I shared with the Trinity on those raw pages! But here and now, I feel this will be my easel. Tonight, my blog shall be my journal… and I hope you will see my spirit.

This summer, God woke me with truth. He taught my cold, hard self that honesty will forever triumph over deceit. It cannot happen any other way. So, tonight, I bear my soul to you. This is my heart.

“Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart are enlarged; bring me out of my distresses. Consider my affliction and my trouble, and forgive all my sins.” Psalm 25:16-18

I spent a summer begging God to break me. I literally spent 3 months asking Him to overtake my soul, throw down my strong-places, trample my pride, and lay my glory in the dust. I repeatedly asked God to break me… and leave me broken. I wanted my hip touched this summer. I wanted to return to College Station limping. I wanted to see myself as the insignificance that I am and see my God as the great Foundation that I truly must stand on. I wanted an ache in my soul with every stride reminding me of the gracious God on which I depend.

And you know what?

God answers prayers.

My hip has been touched. My soul limps with each and every step. And though I hoped all breaking would be finished by summer’s end, it certainly is not.

My heart hurts. And I know I am certainly not alone in this. So many people are just aching right now in the midst of this imperfect world. I admit that even depression seems evident in me and I cannot explain the cause. Lonliness is evident even amongst so much fellowship. Despite busyness, the Spirit has kept me in the Scriptures and in prayer. Ministry is in abundance and He has me in the middle of it. I am watching brothers and sisters growing leaps and bounds in Him. And it is not sin that is keeping my soul hurting.

No, it is some sort of dark night in which I tread. Some dark night of brokenness.

I cannot explain it. I trust only in the Lord. He is disciplining me and growing me and I know fully that He alone knows best.

And so, to any who read seeking empathy and encouragement, this is all I have. Three Scriptures. Three truths. Three drops of water in a dry place. Three bites of bread.

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.” Psalm 51:17

“For in this tent we groan, longing to put on our heavenly dwelling, if indeed by putting it on we may not be found naked. For while we are still in this tent, we groan, being burdened – not that we would be unclothed, but that we would be further clothed, so that what is mortal may be swallowed but be Life. He who has prepared us for this very thing is God, who has given us the Spirit as a guarantee.

“So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, for we walk by faith, not by sight. Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please Him.” II Corinthians 5:2-9

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." Matthew 5:3,4

Take and eat what satisfies.

Thank You for the encouragement You have blessed me with in Jenn, in Nick, in Ben, in Carl, in Mark, in Jimbo, in Clark, and in so many others. Thank You for carrying me through.

I give up all of this busyness, all these stresses, all these commitments, relationships, responsibilities. Everything. I give it up. All to You.

I will rejoice in suffering and worship my Creator. God let not this dark time get in the way of You loving through me! Do not stem the tide of living water that flows from my heart. Father, be glorified in me! And let not the Enemy deceive my eyes. Expand Your Kingdom.

I worship You. I smile in You. I trust in You.

You are my Everything.

I am nothing.

I love You so much.

Absurdities of Life #3

Since returning home from New York, I have found out that the owners of the Katy Courier have pulled out. I leave town and the paper goes under. It's done. Over. The Katy Courier has completely folded.

Dang.

What a crazy experience this summer job has been. But, even still, my four weeks of work there taught me plenty about the work place, people, and graphics design(?)...

I praise God for my short stay and now faithfully await the next door He will open in employment this summer.

The City That Never Sleeps

The cab driver, Sieed, driving me into Manhattan while explaining his journey from Bangladesh to the United States in “hopes of a better life.”

The Hassidic Jew walking down Fifth Avenue in his long black robe and matching hat, ear-locks bobbing, and typing an email on his Blackberry.

The boy in Chinatown who speaks English as his second language just like his Vietnamese, immigrant parents.

The prostitute in the street, selling herself to survive and tragically dependent on the pimp that keeps her in slavery.

The homeless woman tredging down Broadway with all her belongings dragging in a box tied to her back, begging for help and relief.

The young professional sitting down on the subway to read his Gay Pride magazine as the shoddier teenager next to him reads his Bible.

The young congregation of believers meeting in a hotel on Sunday morning as they continue their adventure in loving on this global city and sharing the Light of Jesus Christ.

These were the things I saw that make New York what it is. These are the images that I fell in love with in my short stay.

New York represents the idolatry of so many, including myself. It symbolizes patriotism, materialism, globalization, individualism, greed, worldliness, humanism, debauchery, and the list goes on. In moderation, most of these would never be an issue, but it is New York. The biggest and the brightest; the loudest and the most astounding. In this the city embraces what’s fatal.

Bars, clubs, liquor stores, and pornography venues lurk below the upscale, flourishing businesses in floors above. Wall Street works hard and parties hard… all in the name of success. But cannot an overbearing patriotism be equally dangerous? I watched so many swell with more pride at the face of Lady Liberty than the face of Christ. Oh, Father, the Enemy blinds all men everywhere.

But that is why I love this place. It is so lost. For so much of my saved life, I saw it as “us verses them.” The Church against the world. Saved against sinners. How wrong I was. I am no better than the Lost. I have been saved by grace. I am not standing at the Cross looking down at people. I am kneeling before it begging them to come and join me. I am no less of a sinner. My sin has only been covered by Jesus’ blood.

These people are going to perish. Sieed, the Hassidic Jew, the young professional. Without Jesus, they are going to burn in the flames of Hell having committed nothing worse than I if something is not done about it. We are commissioned first to love people and then, in that love, to share the Good News with them. We are told to be Christ to them.

Oh how I would love to watch Jesus in the streets of New York.

I don’t think He would ignore all the homeless begging for aide.

I don’t think He would refuse to offer His seat to another on the subway.

I don’t think He would flee the chance to go with co-workers to the bar after work and love on them there.

I think He would fight to win the heart of the prostitute and offer her a way to freedom in both this life and the next.

I think He would defy the principles of success and shock people with His servant-based heart.

I think He would help as many in need as He could without ever asking anything in return.

I think He would share the Good News that can only be embraced through Him.

I loved New York and feel, somewhere deep down, that my time there is not yet over. Maybe I’ll return someday, by the grace of God alone, and help friends like Sieed discover a far “better life” than his Hindu origins imagine.

Live from New York, it's... my blog

Well, I'm sitting in my friends' apartment on my last morning in New York. What an incredible trip. I feared that I would fall in love with this place and, in many ways, have. I cannot wait to reflect on this adventure and see what the Lord has taught me.

Over 1.5 million people on a single island (not even including the other Buroughs). So many people. So many stories. So many souls. What an incredeible place.

I'll update soon.